Some folks...

"That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real, you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand." - The Velveteen Rabbit

"There is no greater love than this - that a man would lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends...the world will hate you...They will do all these things to you as my disciples because they do not know the one who sent me." - Jesus
John 15 (Phillips)

There will always be people who just don't understand. That sentence is hard to type because I realize it sounds awfully close to boasting and swaggering. But I type it anyway. I sat with a wise friend yesterday who said, "John, some folks just don't understand...they haven't heard the voice of love...the voice of greater love." I am thankful for this friend.

I've been wrestling with some feelings lately and I've really been trying to listen to what God has for me in those emotions. My friend's words gave some needed clarity to this angst. I've been bumping into people who just don't understand. I've felt ugly in their eyes. My life and faith these days looks, well...shabby. I feel like my hair is being loved off, figuratively speaking. In my case, I've let it grow, literally speaking. And that represents a wildness I feel God has called me to. But some folks don't like it. My eyes are dropping out. God is teaching me, forcing me somedays, to see with the eyes of my heart. And my friends, that's a different kind of seeing...or listening...same thing really. I'm loose in the joints. Kurt Vonnegut said people don't come to church to hear preachments; they come to daydream about God. You gotta be loose to daydream. None of this feels very good, but I realize it's the path of becoming Real. If that sounds boasty and swaggery, it's not meant to. Trust me, I haven't been swaggering around the last week or so; it's felt more like crawling.

The one whose love is greater is beckoning me further and further into Real. He calls me "friend" and "child" and "beloved." He also calls me "John" - which means "beloved" so that works out lovely. This may be the last post of this velveteen thread; maybe, maybe not. I've needed to be reminded by friends who understand and people who don't, that Real is letting JESUS love you for a long, long time. And that it hurts...sometimes. And that there will be days when I'll feel ugly in the eyes of others. And it's o.k. to feel that, but I must return to the truth that "these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly." Boast and Swagger Christianity (BaSC) isn't going anywhere; it's been around for a long, long time. Some folks just don't understand. But maybe, just maybe some of those folks might one day chase a rabbit, a hairy, droopy-eyed, loose-jointed, shabby-as-all-get-out rabbit. And if they do, I pray my tracks will point them to Greater Love...the one who has loved us for a long, long time. The one who makes us REAL.