"It is not that what is is not enough, for it is; it is that what is has been disarranged, and is crying out to be put in place."
- Madeleine L'Engle, Walking On Water
I live in a Christian subculture where "more" is the order of the day. Cries like, "Isn't there more?" abound in almost every book written and conference attended. "There's got to be more" falls from the lips of many a disgruntled church member and inhabits the lines of many of the songs we currently sing. Now, I understand "holy discontent" and wanting to know more of God; that's not what I'm talking about here. There's a discontent behind this current verbiage that doesn't feel holy at all.
Something about this rubs me wrong. I'm not exactly sure what I'm feeling, but I know I'm feeling something. I came across Madeleine's words the other day and they stopped me in my tracks. It really felt like she was articulating what I was feeling. What if what is is enough? What if the people and places and things of my life, right now, are enough? What if the discontent that I feel or experience is because the "enough" of my life has been "disarranged, and is crying out to be put in place"?
That feels more true to me. I'm not talking about NOT seeking out new faces and places and experiences; shucks, I'm a seeker and always have been - a rover, a wanderer/wonderer. Honest seeking is a vital part of the life of faith. But the current quest for "more" that I see and hear feels dangerously close to fickle-ness, an inability to be in place or present; it's almost a stance of I'm-not-of-this-world-and-I-really-don't-want-to-be-in-it-either. It's a stance of I-don't-want-to-do-the-hard-work-required-to-rearrange-things. And maybe that's it - laziness. Laziness cloaked in the guise of "surely there's more" and when the guise is removed the real words are "surely there's more than fallen people and fallen places and..."
A little down the page, Madeleine L'Engle told me what you have to be in order to live in this disarranged world. An artist; men and women and children putting their hands to the plow of co-laboring with God in the rearrangement of the world. You might even say, "His Kingdom coming and His will being done."
God, you have surrounded me with enough this day. Grant me the courage to work toward it's rearrangement. It is crying out to be put in place, O Lord.
Could "disarrangement" be the natural byproduct of living from a heart that is deceitfully wicked? Couldn't "Isn't there more?!" be the cry that inevitably comes from those who are emerging into lives preoccupied by attempts to heal wounds (which is really nothing more than striving to satisfy the the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life)? Could your "path less traveled" really be wide and well-worn? Could your own wanderings - purposeless journey - be leading you to the same conclusion Solomon came to, "All is vanity - fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man."? Are you really surprised where the trail is leading or has ended in light of the fact that, based on this blog, you seem to have forsaken "The Way"?
ReplyDeleteJust questions to ponder.
CHS
chspurgeon:
ReplyDeleteYour voice sounds an awful lot like someone I used to know.
Sad that you couldn't say those things except under the guise of anonymity.
Meredith
It is truly sad that those who feel superior would choose to adopt a false name to throw stones. Confession sounds like a tailor-made solution.
ReplyDeleteJohn, thank you. That's a fresh and refreshing take on longing. I needed that, to remember that I ache not for another world, but for God to put the world to rights. Thank God, the resurrection of Christ promises all creation will be made new...
ReplyDeleteAnd to chspurgeon, why do you throw a sucker punch like that and then hide behind another name? You seem like a pretty angry man.
Still thinking about these words, John...and find that they indeed resound in my spirit--for sometimes we have enough and need to rearrange it and be better stewards of what the LORD has already given us.
ReplyDeleteThen I think upon this first comment and wonder, Mr. chspurgeon, if I was a seeker, looking for a Savior...would I find Him through you? How are you making the body of Christ look, sir? Take stock of that plank in your eye, for I fear you may be a stumbling stone for many...though I do not know you at all. My Jesus does. And I pray that you become more like Him and less like the brood of vipers, the pharisees. What does the mirror show when you look in it, sir? Not much like my Savior, I'm afraid. Be careful then how you speak and how you reflect the LORD to others.
Sincerely and with Agape,
Holly Smith
Mr. Spurgeon,
ReplyDeleteOn what basis do you nullify a seeking heart and mind? On what basis are you so sure about yourself? Since the human heart deceitfully wicked are we to assume you have it mastered, and filter your fine articulations through a holy grail of understanding? I remember Someone once said, "you cats who think your without sin, righteous and have it all figured out then pick up a stone and start chunking." Funny thing is, they all walked away. It seems you opted to throw. Interesting.
Mo